Because I am nothing if not helpful

So. This has been happening:

I did a teeny bit of research. And by teeny, I mean I actually looked up the actual twitter handle of said nursing shirt people. Such hard work, yo. I mean I almost got a cramp in my pinky finger.

WELL, HELLO @Undercover_Mama! It's like my name, only...DIFFERENT. And now I sort of feel bad. Because the peoples, they keep retweeting this, and I have nothing to give away. Except assvice, and #thatswhatshesaid jokes.

So. As not to confuse those who are angling to win yourself a breastfeeding shirt. LET ME HELP YOU:

Me:

1. Married to Retired Marine
2. Works at Big Fancy Hospital
3. Breastfed both of my brats old skool style, without fancy hiding shirts because MY KIDS ARE OLD. 
• And so am I.
• And I wish a m-f'er WOULD'VE had something to say about it, so that they could get cussed the fuck out.
4. NO UNDERSCORE

@Undercover_Mama:

1. There is an underscore.
2. Not Me.

You're welcome.

A Reminder....

This month is National Breast Cancer Awareness Month

PLEASE, get your boobies checked.

The TRUE Meaning...

mon·de·green: (mŏn'də-grēn', môn'-) n. A series of words that result from the mishearing or misinterpretation of a statement or song lyric. For example, I led the pigeons to the flag instead of I pledge allegiance to the flag.

Every year for Christmas Eve, the family has Christmas Dinner and a gift exchange at my Mom’s house. This was created so that we can all get together for the Holiday, without having to spend Christmas DAY driving all over LA to visit everyone, and we can spend it doing whatever we’d like.

So there we are, sitting around passing out gifts, laughing and listening to “Have yourself a Merry Little Christmas” on a local radio station that plays Christmas music, when my cousin announces to no one in general:

I JUST NOW realized the words to this song are NOT “Happy golden days, up yours.”

(Well, if THAT doesn’t scream Christmas spirit, I don’t know what does. But, if I’m going to be honest, I’ve thought UP YOURS to no less than THREE people when I was doing my last minute Christmas shopping and said it to the lady that stole my parking space at the mall)

Tits & Tats

This month is not just about MY BIRTHDAY...which, it still is, thank-you-very-much... It's also about my boobs.

I know...nice rack, right?

Contrary to what you think, this is NOT a peep show, it's a Public Service Announcement. It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month. So....Show 'em your tits! And by them, I mean: YOUR DOCTOR. (See..? Not an invitation to flash just any ol' body) Know if you are a high risk. Feel yourself up monthly. And when it's time...Get checked.

And in keeping with the theme thinking pink...I got this here tattoo in honor of my MIL. She was a cool broad, and even though she lost her fight with breast cancer last year, she went down swinging. She meant as much to me as my own mother and she will be missed for a long time to come. And by a long time, I mean forever.

Thirteen things

Thirteen Things about ME

Well, check Meme Out (hehe..get it?)

1. I love a man in Uniform

2. I got married in Hawaii on the beach, when I was 19 years old. My husband wore his Uniform.

3. I have moved 7 times in the last 15 years. Thank you, Marine Corps.

4. I have NEVER lived overseas, but I have always wanted to live in Spain.

5. Within 6 months, my MIL came to visit me in Hawaii, and stayed for 2 months. I actually enjoyed it because she cooked every day.

6. I hated it too, because I knew she knew I wasn't listening to the radio every night at bedtime.

7. I lived in Boston for 4 years and it was the worst experience of my life. I came *this close* to divorce. In the end though, The Man & I are better people and have a better relationship because of it.

8. I got two of my four tattoos in Boston.

9. I got my first tattoo when I turned 18 in Hollywood, next door to where I used to work. I was a telemarketer, I hated my job, and there were hookers that worked right in front of my building.

10. I got my last tattoo in honor of my MIL who had breast cancer, along with The Man and his sister. We all have the same tattoo.

11. I almost got a tattoo of an autograph of a Rock god. Thank God the tattoo parlor was booked, because alcohol had let my inner fangirl loose and I was too drunk to reign it in.

12. I have the weirdest taste in music of anyone that I know. ZZ Top is performing and I TOTALLY want to see them.

13. I don't love chocolate. But I LOOOOVE candy.

That last one is completely random...I mean, even MORE random than the other stuff, but still true.


You can check out other Thursday Thirteens here