Thursday, January 6, 2011
The things I do for my girls....
I almost ALWAYS lie about my weight. Mostly because I can. I weigh a lot. I am OBVIOUSLY overweight. But. I look as though I weigh less than I do. If that makes sense.
So I usually knock off around 10 lbs. SIGH. Women. We can be so vain, yes?
Anyways. Along with the shredding, I was given a log to write down my measurements: Weight, Chest, Waist, Hips, Wrist, and Forearm. (Forearm. Random, don’t you think?). OF COURSE, my period decides to come A WHOLE WEEK EARLY just so that when I start this whole 30 day shred, I’m all SUPER BLOATED and crampy and I CAN’T EVEN EXPRESS TO YOU THE BACK PAIN. WTF. Also? Fuck you Mother Nature, you’re a big giant asshole. *cough* But, I digress.
I thought it was just a PERSONAL log to keep track of weight/inches lost.
And then, my friend sent her measurements on Monday. OH. I DID NOT KNOW I WAS GOING TO HAVE TO SHARE THIS INFORMATION WITH EVERYONE?! ::cue the internal screaming.
She’s small. She has pounds she wants to lose, but really? She’s at the weight I want to be. EITHER WAY. She’s got balls. She sent all of us her measurements. I KNOW HOW BIG HER HIPS ARE, Y’ALL. You know how much you have to trust someone who is NOT a medical professional before you can put that kind of information in their hands?
So I went home. Pulled out my measuring tape and put it on the bathroom counter.
And then went to the kitchen to eat a piece of sweet potato pie.
And then thought I’m totally doing this wrong.
And then I got distracted by some shiny thing. So I forgot. Quite possibly, accidentally on purpose. But in the meantime, I’ve been hitting the gym, rode my bike several miles and have a date with the gym again tonight.
Now it’s Wednesday. I get dressed for work and see the measuring tape. Can I really put my weight into cyberspace? Can I put the ACTUAL NUMBERS in an e-mail? I don’t even tell my husband how much I weigh. And he knows pretty much everything there is to know about me. Except that. He walked in just as I was measuring my waist.
So how many inches? Are you serious? I am NOT telling you that.
Can you measure me? Sure.
Now, Can I measure you? Umm, NO.
He pulls out the scale and gets on. I say, I weigh less than that. Not as much less as I’d like, but less.
I came to work. And I thought about how many other things I've shared with my girls. My worries. My joys. My completely random thoughts. And how they support me, whenever I need it. And sometimes, when I think I don't. So. I sent an e-mail to the girls with ALL of my true measurements. Including my weight. These girls? I’d do anything for.
APPARENTLY, even things I won’t do for my husband.