Saturday, July 25, 2009

Undefined

I read a lot of blogs. MOST of them have children. A few don't.

This space is mostly about me. How sometimes I hate my job, or my husband. How much I love my friends. How I have a love/hate relationship with my stupid damn cat, who I have begun to call Jackass. Because he is. How I just went to Vegas AGAIN (which I did AND? going back again next month)

I started this blog because I wanted an outlet to be me uncensored, even though IRL I very rarely put on the filter that stops me from saying stupid things like calling my co-worker Noxema Jackson because she looks like, ummm...Wesley Snipes in a dress. (If it helps, so far SHE hasn't heard me, but I'm pretty sure it's only a matter of time). And also because I have a horrible memory and I would like to preserve some of this shit SOMEWHERE. You'd hope that if you ever met a rock star you'd remember...especially if you met him TWICE, but what if you get hit by a bus and have amnesia? I probably wouldn't even remember my name let alone that I met the man I'd leave my husband for.

I am who I've always been. A person who kinda fits everywhere and nowhere. I'm liked by mostly everyone, I'm sort of anti-social, I'm a flirt, I'm shy, I'm enormously confident and randomly insecure. I have freaky phobias (I could never EVER date a basketball player. EVER), I love music, muscle cars, high heels and cowboy movies.

I don't write about my kids very often because at 19 and 13, there's an awful lot they do that doesn't include me. Which is fine. They have to start pulling away so that they can grow and get ready for when they don't have me to run back to, because they most CERTAINLY cannot live here forever. Psht...say whatcha want: I got a husband y'all, and I'm looking forward to having sex on the living room table whenever we want and not just when they're hanging out at the mall or something.

Am I a mommy blogger because I can haz kids? Or am I a blogger that happens to have popped out some kids? I don't know if it's appropriate to say that I called my kid an ass when she was acting like one. Or that I let my 19 year old have a portion of my Jack & Coke because we were at home AND I've been drinking hard liquor since I was like, 14 when my cousin & I used to drink her grandma's stash of Hennessy when I would spend the night...AND my mom let me have my 1st "wine cooler" when I was 16? Is it okay to say that I point & laugh at my kids when they say things that don't make sense (No. Canadians don't come from CANADIA. They come from Canada)

For a while I was getting all freaked out because I didn't know what to say. Because I'm only good at letting it hang out when life's good. Money problems, family drama, bullshit in general mentally constipates me. But I like to keep it real, and honestly, I only know how to be me...for what THAT'S worth. So, I'm going to stop worrying about what to say, and just say what the fuck I FEEL like saying. Mmm...Just typing that made me feel better.

7 comments:

Shania said...

That's what we're here for. The good and the bad. But I find myself censoring too. Sometimes it's hard not to. But I can pretty much guarantee that you'll get support and friendship no matter what you share.

So Not Mom-a-licious said...

I swear I hope you go to Vegas in October. And I'm dying to know why you would never ever date a basketball player.
I totally love it when you say whatever the fuck you want. heehee....I got to say fuck. twice.

Aimeepalooza said...

I have a hard time letting it all hang out too. I can brag about my kids but the rest...it's kind of tough. I totally relate. I call my kids aholes when they act like aholes too.

Kori said...

Sometimes kids ARE assholes. Just sayin. And hey, it is your life; we just get to stop by and take a little slice out of it. And I, for one, love it.

JustMiss said...

I love this post. You know me, I dont feel like a mommyblogger, hell I don't know where I fit really. I just write because I want to.

Totally cannot wait to see where you go from here.

Elftea said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Elftea said...

Love ya. And you have a few freaky phobias:
one begins with F and the other E
F---
&
E------ in the -------!
Guess
Ha ha ha